Business · Just for the heck of it · Soul thoughts

“It’s not about you.”

I’m on my way to getting schooled in the same lesson for the 78th time. It’s not about me.

I highly recommend everyone have a counselor or therapist they chat with periodically. I strongly believe in them. If for no other reason than that they equip people with tools and resources to navigate life that common folks can’t or don’t provide.

There’s my shameless therapist/counselor plug. Get one.

So anyway, there I am in one of my little chats sitting across the way from my counselor and she says, “it’s not about you.”

It’s not? Wait, what?!

“It’s not about you.” It’s about them. They did what they needed to do in that moment for themselves.

The ever-so-dim light bulb is starting to turn on. The dimmest of dimmer lights, let me tell you.

It’s not about me?

It’s not about me.

It’s not about me?

It’s not about me.

I’m catching on. How people act and react, what they say and do, usually has very little, if anything, to do with us. It’s about them. It’s about what’s going on in their world.

Can you believe that?!

Think about it though – our kids say something to us and we snap…it’s about what’s going on with us way more than what they’ve said. Did they catch us on little sleep? Coming off a rough phone call? Expectations of getting so much more done that day?

If it’s true of us, it’s true of others.

Next time we’re about to go in guns blazing because of how someone “treated” us, it’s best to rehearse the line, “it’s not about me.”

I’ll probably be on lesson 79 or 80 of this soon. Feel free to join the party.

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